Overheard

Jacob and Hannah have built up a store of money from babysitting, lawn-cutting and the like.  We finally got around to putting their money into their (de-active, oops) bank accounts.  Jacob, not in the mood to visit the bank, said, "How about we find a bookstore instead and spend $595?"

Dave and the twins were in Niagara Falls and Toronto the last week of June for three days on the year-end class trip.  Departure time was 5:15 am and the three of them walked to the school in the dawn hours.  Later that day Joe suggested that those of us who remained so sadly at home should go and get ice cream at the local ice cream shop.  I told him that it would be quite expensive.  Joe quipped back, "Oh, you don't have to pay."
I replied, "I don't want you wasting your money on ice cream."
To which he said, "Wellll, technically it's not really my money."
I raised a questioning eyebrow.
"I sort of found it this morning on the way to school when I was hiding my bike in the woods."
"You mean along the path that Dad and the twins walked this morning to school?"
Turns out Jacob had lost a twenty on the way to his school trip and Joe had serendipitously found it.  And offered to spend it just as fast as it had been lost.

An unnamed child, while squishing potato bugs in the garden:  "Mom, the male bugs are on top of the female bugs and, when I squish the females, eggs come out.  I think I'm in potato-bug health class."

Me:  "Do you want to know how 'things' work?"

Child:  "No, but I think I'm getting closer."

Grandpa Mike was over last night for supper.  He likes to tell stories from his and his family's past.  Those of you who know him might be familiar with the story of the gobbler, or the turkey that turned out to be the devil.  No, not joking.  

Anyway.

Last night he was telling us how his dad wanted to turn 98.  (He died at 94.)  Hannah asked why 98 and Mike answered that his dad had a neighbour, Billy LeVair (rhymes with bear), who had turned 98.  Hannah, not hearing correctly, asked, "Billy the Bear?"  

To which Mike responded, "A bear?  There was no bear!"

"But you said Billy the Bear."

"No, there was no bear."

Who's on first.  What's on second...

The joys of a grandparent who won't wear his hearing aid.